Carlal’s Weblog

A suburban mom, her family, her life, and her world views.

Yeah, I still love him… & I’m smiling again!!!

We did it! Right now I am so happy that I cried! My husband and I made love just like we used to, and we both achieved an orgasm! Seems like something so common, but it really gives me hope.

This time, he tried. He held back and made certain that I was enjoying things also. It was not as powerful as it has been, but it was powerful enough! 🙂 although he did scare me with the magnitude of his release!

What happened to change the course of events, I do not know. All I know is that I had left a message with the kids to tell him that he had to call his mom because, her house was broken into. I had to take our oldest son to The Men’s Warehouse to pick up the tux for tomorrow nights prom. His girlfriends prom is tomorrow. Anyway when we get back, my husbands truck is still in the parking area of our home. I go in and climb up the stairs to our bedroom, and ask him what was going on with his mother. He tells me that it was the other house and not the one she is living in and that he was waiting for me to get home before he left. He was in the office, doing homework. I entered the office and gave him a kiss on the cheek. as I turned to leave, he grabed my hand and stood up. He then proceeded to tell me how good I looked, and pulled me to him and kissed me. A deep sensual kiss. My knees buckled, as I was not expecting this. I kissed him back and he began to run his hands up and down my back, until he captured my head in his hamds and made sure that I melted! He mumbled something about having to check on his mother, and I mumbled something back about it bieng okay for him to leave. But he didn’t move away from me, instead his hands went underneath my shirt and the rest is blissful history!

We talked afterwards, about how hurt I still am, but how much I still love him. He tried to reassure me that he loves only me, and I think that I believe him. He says that he is trying to understand that the magnitude of the pain I feel is not something that I will get over easily, but that he wants to let me know that I am the only person he ever wanted to spend the rest of his life with. He asked me to once again, to forgive him. He said that he does not understand his idiocy, and why he would have done something that he knew would hurt me if I ever found out. He says that he loves me, and yeah, I still love him!



  ana wrote @

he is probably cheating again, go figure… they love to screw the wife then the lover and then the wife again…

  ckt wrote @

You still love him….I understand that part….BUT DOES HE REALLY LOVE you? The truth is most men cheat because they are not in love with their wifes anymore. Think about it REALLY — would you cheat if you were REALLY in love? Probably not. When we are TRULY in love, we can’t stand the thought of being away from this person. The fact that he strayed proves that he thinks MORE of himself. It will happen again, it is only a matter of time. Most people FEAR change especially after you gave your life to someone expecting the SAME RESPECT AND LOVE in return. When he was fucking this OW, do you REALLY think he was thinking of you? Most likely than not, the REAL reason couple stay together after this happens is b/c of FEAR of having to start over especially after so many years of marriage, kids, a house, etc. This feeling is normal too. But it is BETTER than staying with someone who ONLY CLAIMS to love YOU know that you found out. Now how does that make you feel? Think about it – it hurts that he does not love you the same in return. I think you are in denial because you TOO are affraid of the outcome of your life in a separation and so you LIE to YOURSELF. Men don’t change – don’t think you can change him. Once a pig, always a pig – it is a pattern. Find someone that REALLY RESPECTS and LOVES you. The fact that we went to see porn after fucking you, shows you how LITTLE he respects you and you really are not enough for him. He is looking for something different. He may “CARE” for you, BUT, I don’t think he REALLY loves you. Sorry, but honesty can be HARD. Take a GOOD look at yourself first and see why you stay with someone who abuses you.

  ckt wrote @

BTW, I hope you had him checked out for STD’s b/c you fucked him.

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